Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
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