That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
