Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I have already put on my inside pants.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize