You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Randomize
