doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
he shaved USA in his pubs
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
