I hate your face
bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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