I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
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