We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
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