mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Randomize
