i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
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