only if we run a train.
done.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
