I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
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