Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
