Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I am spending my child support on dildos
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
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