I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
Love having children with random chicks
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
21 Of The Most Regrettable Tattoo Ideas Ever
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.