why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
