Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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