I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
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He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
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Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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