wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Randomize
