addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
