Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
