we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Randomize
