Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  did you get engaged???

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): did you get engaged??? http://tfl.nu/bgu9
  Replies (15) Good night (971) Bad night (2185) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Ontario

  I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (416): I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment... http://tfl.nu/srde
  Replies (8) Good night (2810) Bad night (704) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook

  (1-401): View more from Rhode Island

  you can....by speaking....

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook (1-401): you can....by speaking.... http://tfl.nu/42zu
  Replies (16) Good night (2226) Bad night (2625) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  Please dont jizz on my ds screen.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (850): Please dont jizz on my ds screen. http://tfl.nu/cm8h
  Replies (18) Good night (730) Bad night (4996) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that. http://tfl.nu/622i
  Replies (20) Good night (2306) Bad night (4572) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (804): you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning http://tfl.nu/f3jq
  Replies (33) Good night (9549) Bad night (673) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (661): View more from California

  Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (661): Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed. http://tfl.nu/tpz0
  Replies (29) Good night (5054) Bad night (1141) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (403): Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me. http://tfl.nu/6qnx
  Replies (23) Good night (11155) Bad night (1007) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (250): I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite http://tfl.nu/yccl
  Replies (4) Good night (1075) Bad night (1127) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (510): View more from California

  I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard

  (1-510): View more from California

  Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (510): I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard (1-510): Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening. http://tfl.nu/lvw9
  Replies (5) Good night (2297) Bad night (630)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (707): They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven http://tfl.nu/tpek
  Replies (10) Good night (1905) Bad night (544) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise. http://tfl.nu/t24q
  Replies (2) Good night (320) Bad night (1287)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes. http://tfl.nu/1wpu
  Replies (12) Good night (996) Bad night (353)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (315): im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass. http://tfl.nu/ll9k
  Replies (4) Good night (482) Bad night (783)
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (415): Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx. http://tfl.nu/4yiy
  Replies (3) Good night (378) Bad night (713) Order T-Shirt

Randomize