Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
