I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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