Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
