so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
