oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
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