go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I forgot how hot balto sounded
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
