apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
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Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
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Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
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