Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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