the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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