yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
