Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
