R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
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