Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
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