Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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