That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
