Fine. I'll sleep in my office
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
