: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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