i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Randomize
