Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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