I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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