Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
