i really wish james franco would like my vagina
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have grass duct taped all over my body
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
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