There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize
