I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
You pole danced in your parka.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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