come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
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