when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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