I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Randomize
