i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
10+ Incredible Tumblr Stories That Will Leave You Shook
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
16 People Who Have Raised The Bar For Petty Revenge
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.