just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Randomize
